Devil In Disguise
by La Victime
Summary: Duke's twin sister is recruited into the Joe's after they've been hacked and she was targeted. Will sparks fly between the silent ninja and the rambunctious twin? Or will death do them part? SExOC
1. Hidden Sibling

Devil In Disguise

Hey, guys! I know, I keep writing new stuff, but when you have inspiration, what else can you do? I'm nearly done with most of my other stuff, just working out the kinks in my head before getting it out. Battered Souls is currently being re-written, many thoughts and better stories later =] I hope you enjoy this one, I'll be working on another new one the moment I see Ninja Assassin again. I don't own G.I. Joe, its characters, though I wouldn't mind owning Snake Eyes! =]

Chapter 1: Hidden Sibling

I groaned and rolled over, ignoring the blaring of my alarm clock and opting to take notice of my sore body. I knew I'd been hurt bad, but it wasn't necessarily horrible. I'd had worse. Swinging my feet over my bed, the sting of the cold, wood floor woke me up completely. The sun filtered through the window, illuminating my pale skin, copper hair glimmering. I smiled at my reflection in the mirror. Despite the disappearing black eye, the pale, nearly invisible, scars on my face, arms and legs, I was a fairly attractive person. The nicest? Not so much. The most attractive? I don't think so, but I like to think I'm pretty, Not beautiful or gorgeous, just pretty. My laptop beeped at me, alerting me to a new email. Without looking, I new it was from my brother, Conrad. Plopping down on my chair and opening the new message, I smiled at my accuracy.

_"Dear Desdemona,_

_ I know I haven't been writing lately, but things have been chaotic. I've only just now been able to get enough down time (and permission) to send you an update. You know I'm not supposed to, but my commanding officer understands, I have to tell you this. Some...terrorists, for lack of a better word, are on the loose and we're not sure how far they got into the employee logs. We were hacked earlier, can't give you details, sorry. I just want you to be careful out there. For all I know they could've seen my personal info and found you. I don't want you hurt. By the way, no more fighting. I realize you love it and that it helps, but try something else. One of my friends meditates all the time (damn ninja-ness) and it seems to work for him. Maybe you should try it. Well, sadly, I have to go. I can hear Rip hollering for me in the halls. I'll try to email you again later. I love you._

_ Twins Always,_

_ Duke"_

I nearly cried. Cried out of frustration, that is. I hated having a twin sometimes, really I did. Especially when that twin was a few minutes older than me and was more overprotective than a mother hen. So I fight. A lot. Big deal, it wasn't like it was illegal or killing me. I rarely ever got hit. These were from when I first started, except for the black eye. I'll never let my guard down around a tiny woman ever again. Never ever again. I really should've gone with my better judgement and not underestimated her, considering I was only a centimeter taller than her. Looking back over the message, I realized how bad it must've been. He never used my nickname, not unless there was serious trouble. I sighed and stood up, heading for my bathroom.

After my nice, long, hot shower, I dressed in grey bike shorts and a black tank top. The air seemed to shift around me and I froze. The hairs on the back of my neck and my arms rose to stand on end, instantly my sai occupied my hands. Quickly, I strapped a kunai pouch onto my left thigh and another to hold my shuriken on my right. I grabbed my two katanas, placing them in an 'X' formation on my back. The silver lotus flowers on the hilts glittered in the sun briefly as I rushed out of my room, grabbing my laptop, shoving it into its bag. Running by the painting on the left wall of the hallway, I clicked a side panel and watched as the wall slid to reveal guns. Reluctantly, I pulled out my .44 magnum, .45 desert eagle, and my baby, my 10mm sub machine gun. I'm not one for guns, really I'm not. Sadly, they do come in handy when I need quick fire so I can run. Placing the magnum and the desert eagle in their respective places, hiding the sub in my bag, I dashed out to my red lamborghini murcielago. Shoving my stuff in the back, keeping the sub near to me, I revved the engine and sped out of the drive way. I grabbed my phone and quickly called Duke.

"Hello?"

"Hey, twin, bro, buddy, pal."

"Kat? What's wrong?"

"Got your email, but I was in a hurry to leave the house, so I wasn't able to reply. Thought I'd call." I answered nonchallantly, knowing he'd figure it out.

"Okay, hang on. The General wants to talk to you." I nodded, though he couldn't see it, and waited patiently.

"Miss Hauser, I'm a little concerned that you've called Duke. Anything I can help with?"

"Call me Desdemona."

"Alright, Desdemona, is there anything I can do?"

"Can you--shit!" I yelled, swerving to avoid a lovely little grenade. "Missed me you bastard!" I laughed, flooring it, loving the sound of the engine roaring.

"What's happened?"

"Looks like that terrorist group accessed some personal info of Duke's and knows who I am. I just got- DAMN IT!!" I screamed again, the heat from the fly of bullets coming through my back window was uncomfortably close to my head.

"I've got you on speaker, Desdemona. Stay on the line and we'll pinpoint your location and send someone to help you." he replied.

"Ok. Hey, bro, don't worry about...ah shit...they have a bazooka. They have a mother fucking, cock sucking, bitching bazooka. This is just NOT my week." I grumbled, "One moment, General. I have to jump." All I heard was a rather loud, _"You're going to WHAT?!"_ before I tucked the phone in my shirt, grabbed the sub, and my bag, before I swerved, parked, and jumped from my car just in time for my pursuers to crash into it. The flames flew to the sky with heated fingers, fingers itching, it seemed, to grab hold of me. I ran and hid behing a house, taking the phone back out.

"I'm back. Find me yet?" I asked, calmly, knowing I was going to get hell for this later. But I wasn't going to think of later. I was going to think of now and how I was going to stay alive long enough for them (whoever they were, aside from my brother) to find me and get me out of here.

"We've got a lock. Team Alpha, go. Search and Rescue mission. Do not leave without Desdemona alive. There is no other option." he hollered. I heard a chorus of 'SIr, yes sir.'s before the General was back on the phone with me. "Are you alright?"

"Peachy. Being targeted is something normal. I'm just used to, you know, fists or knives coming at me. Not bullets, grenades, or any other piece of metal that happens to be flamming hot."

"How about your persuers?"

"Did you want them charcoaled, grilled, or burned to a crisp? Because if they're not all of those, they're one of them. I'm hoping its burned to a crisp, but, remember, things aren't going my way." I chuckled darkly, earning a sarcastic laugh from him.

"You're a lot like your brother."

"No, he's a lot like me. Just because I'm younger doesn't mean he didn't pick up some of my characteristics." I smirked, ducking behind another house. "Sorry if you wanted me to stay put, but I don't trust them. I'm not staying in one place too long."

"Where are you now?"

"I am....not sure at the moment. Gimme a sec."

"You may not have a 'sec'."

"Trust me, I do."

"Alright."

I didn't answer again until I could read the sign better from my perch in the tree. "I'm on the corner of South 2nd Street and Arsenal Street." I replied, before pausing. "What in seven hells.....is that....sweet Mary mother of God they have a gattling gun. A rather large, shiny, screaming of death gattling gun." There was a pause in which I sighed. "Mother of hell, I'm not dying without a fight." I growled, "One moment, General." He gave an acknowledgement and I put my phone in my shirt again. I'm sure he heard the distinct _shink_ of metal on metal as I pulled out gruesome, sharp, curved shuriken and readied myself. Taking stock of the situation, assessing my options, I bided my time for the moment, scoping out my targets weak points. There were too many. I aimed for the neck of my closest target. The near silent _sch-wing_ of the shuriken slicing through the air didn't even alert them, but the sickening, slick _thwack_ they made as they sliced through his jugular veins got their attention. Fortunately, I was skilled with them, I also had enough sense to make sure I moved after I revealed my place. Sure enough, not long after my attack, a rain of bullets littered the spot I had abandoned. I winced as I saw a squirrel fall to the ground, a hole through its body. Bastards. I grabbed more shuriken, five in each hand, and let them fly. The little pieces of metal did more damage than anyone would think. Because they were designed in such a crude way, the curves pointing at nearly every turn, they sliced through flesh rather easily, leaving a jagged gash behind. Blood poured from their wounds and they fell to the ground, the gun left unattended. Not seconds later, a jet landed a few yards from my tree. I stayed hidden, kunai at the ready. A girl with flaming red hair jumped out and aimed a crossbow in my direction, though I was positive she couldn't see me. I was proven wrong when a chunk of the branch below me blew off. It started to break under my weight (which isn't much, but if it's already half broken..) and I threw the kunai at her in defense. They landed where her toes would have been had she not jumped back. She turned her glare to me, but a tall, muscular figure ran out of the jet after her.

"Scarlett, no!" it called, the voice music to my ears.

"Duke!" I yelled, lunging at him. He wrapped his arms around me and laughed.

"I missed you, too, Des." he kissed my head and put me down, surveying the damage. "Your car?" I nearly cried at the memory.

"Resting in peace in that big, junk yard in the sky." I murmured, my mood killed. I glanced around, other members of the team, I'm assuming Team Alpha, lept from the huge bird, guns at the ready, save for one man. He was clad from head to toe in black, a visor covering his eyes; he had two katanas strapped to his back, and I'm sure had other weapons tucked away somewhere. "This the damn ninja man you were telling me about, bro?" I asked, smirking. He nodded and smiled at me.

"Meet Heavy Duty, Scarlett, Breaker and Snake Eyes." he pointed to each in turn. Snake Eyes looked at me, cocked his head and signed something.

"Wait, repeat that please. It's been a while since I had to use sign language." I smiled. He nodded and did as I requested.

"_Are you alright?_"

"Peachy."

"_Did you do all this?_"

"Are you a ninja?" I countered.

"_That's irrelevant._"

"No, it's not. You asked me if I did all of this. I asked you if you're a ninja. Different questions can have the same answer." I smiled. He nodded his head in approval. I turned and retrieved my weapons, never once letting my guard down. I groaned as I stared at the bodies. "Man, now I have to clean off the blood."

"You know you're going to make me do it."

"You're right, brother dear, I am. I have enough blood on me as is."

"You...what happened?!"

"Oh, well, you see, they started shooting at me, which completely took out my back window, then before that was the grenade launched I barely missed, oh and I had to jump out of my car and leave her there to die; Then these dumbasses brought out that lovely, shiny, beautiful piece of death to shoot at me, but I was in the tree, so they didn't see anything coming. I aimed at his neck, he went down rather easily. Then his buddies shot at my spot, after I had left it, and I nailed the rest of them." I explained, pulling the last of my gruesome stars out of a mans head with a sickening squelching noise. "Ugh, brain juice."

"Come on, let's go, Des. We have to get you back to HQ." Rip smiled, throwing an arm around me. "Missed you, munchkin."

"Call me munchkin again and what I do to you will make you wish you ended up like my pals over there." I smiled sweetly, patting his arm and laughing as I followed my brother onto the jet. I had a feeling this was going to be a long, awkward, but enjoyable ride.


	2. Complete 180

I realize that a few of you aren't too fond of my idea, and so far, the story. And I appreciate the constructive criticism I've gotten, but please keep in mind, that was only the first chapter. So, please, wait until at least the 3rd chapter to question my character and my plot. Thanks to kuppcake and Jaded Baby Blues for the wonderful comments and Asterisk78 for the c.c. I appreciate all of it! A special thanks to everyone, really, who reviewed. =] I got 12 of them and I'm so happy! Thank you, guys!

* * *

**Chapter 2: Complete 180**

I sat next to Duke and nearly passed out. My adrenaline rush was gone and I was left with the distinct feelings of disgust and exhaustion. He put an arm around me, giving me a small squeeze before letting go.

"You two don't look like twins, let alone siblings." Scarlett observed, glaring silently at me.

"I'm adopted." I growled, glaring right back.

"Oh, well that explains the copper hair and dark eyes."

"My hair is auburn."

"But it's…"

"I dye it."

"Why?"

"I get bored."

We looked at each other and nodded, smiling.

"I like you."

"The feeling's mutual."

Duke laughed at us, shaking his head.

"So, what happened to your parents?" Heavy Duty asked his accent thick.

"They, uh, they died when I was ten. Duke and I had been friends since I was one, so his parents took me in." I replied my eyes cast downward, willing the tears away. A gloved hand placed itself on my shoulder and my head snapped up. My eyes locked with a visor and he nodded at me, squeezing my shoulder before letting go. "Thanks." I muttered, smiling softly, my cheeks tinged pink.

"Oh my gosh, Trina, are you blushing?" Rip exclaimed, calling attention to my now crimson face.

"Shut up, Rip." I growled, glaring at him. I heard Scarlett stifle a giggle and practically felt Duke holding in his laughter. Snake patted my shoulder, shook his head and shrugged.

"Yes, I know they're immature, but still, you'd think they'd be old enough to handle something like a one-eighty." I grumbled, crossing my arms and pouting. I curled into myself, feeling the shyness slip away and the realization that I just killed who knows how many people finally sank in, leaving me with a large ice-burg in the pit of my stomach. Shivering, I curled further into myself, eyes stinging as the tears that threatened to pour welled up behind my eye lids. I could feel one slip down my cheek; smooth, salty, and wet, leaving a glistening trail behind it. Duke wrapped an arm around me, pulling me close.

"It was either you or them, Alastrina. You did the right thing." he murmured, holding me tightly, hands running through my hair in the old, comforting gesture he did when I was a child. Nodding, I sniffled a tiny bit and burrowed further into his warmth, refusing to face anyone.

"Alastrina, that's your real name?" Breaker asked his accent not as thick as HD's, but enough. I nodded slowly, not willing to move. "So, then why does Duke call you Desdemona?"

"She was in a play back in school and played Desdemona well. Too well, if you ask me," he chuckled, "Ever since then, I've just taken to calling her that."

"Not my fault I'm a good actress." I grumbled the blush still apparent on my cheeks. Scarlett gave me a look and I shrugged at her.

"Prove it."

"Alright, give me a line. Any Shakespearean play, I know them all." I smiled.

"_I hear some noise. Lady, come from that nest of death, contagion and unnatural sleep; a greater power than we can contradict hath thwarted our intents. Come, come away. Thy husband in thy bosom there lies dead; and Paris too. Come, I'll dispose of thee among a sisterhood of holy nuns; stay not to question for the watch is coming; come, go, good Juliet. I dare no longer stay._" Breaker quoted, nodding at Ripcord who promptly moved to lay down on the ground "dead". Instantly, my mind warped, twisted, and I became Juliet.

"_Go, get thee hence, for I will not away. What's here? A cup, closed in my true love's hand? Poison, I see, hath been his timeless end; O churl! Drunk all, and left no friendly drop to help me after? I will kiss thy lips; Haply some poison yet doth hang on them, to make die with a restorative._" I spoke, clearly, sadly, completely Juliet. I bent my head down, pressing my lips to his, feeling him fighting a smile. "_Thy lips are warm._" I paused, as if hearing something, "_Yea, noise? Then I'll be brief. O happy dagger! This is thy sheath! There rust and let me die._" I exclaimed, pantomiming with my hands stabbing myself and falling to rest atop Rip. There were a few moments of silence before Duke clapped, whistling, along with Scarlett, Heavy Duty and Breaker.

"Wow, are you sure you should be a fighter and not an actress?" he asked, helping me up, leaving Rip to get up on his own.

"If she wasn't a fighter, she wouldn't be my Alastrina." Duke chuckled, "This girl can kick my ass in five seconds."

"I can not."

"Can."

"Can't."

"You want to bet on that?"

"Yes, actually, I do."

"Alright, after General Hawk speaks to you, we'll spar for all the Joes to see. Don't go easy on me either." He smirked, winking at me.

"Fine." I shrugged, flipping my hair over. "Rip, I hope you know you're not my Romeo."

"Aw, man. I thought it was real!" he snapped his fingers, "disappointed", before Scarlett hit him in the head. "Ow, what was that for?" he whined, rubbing the sore spot.

"Girlfriend, sitting right here." She growled, though playfully, and pointed at herself.

"Oh, baby, you know you're the only one I love." He smiled, kissing her cheek sloppily.

"Oh, ew! Rip!" she giggled, batting him away half-heartedly. I giggled at them and went back to my seat, leaning back against Duke and falling asleep.

Next I know, I'm being carried and someone taps my shoulder. The person carrying me sets me down, though a strong arm is kept around my waist.

"Welcome, Alastrina, to The Pit."


	3. Welcome Home

Sae: Thanks guys SO much for all the great reviews! I'm up to 18now! Yay! I was actually talking to my best friend yesterday via yahoo and she loves this story, and I couldn't sleep SO I decided to write this chapter! Hope you guys love it like you did the last two!

Chapter 3: Welcome Home

"_Welcome, Alastrina, to The Pit."_

First words I hear and I'm sure my parents are rolling in their graves in complete and utter amusement. I knew they had been involved with the Joes at one point, but had left once my mom was pregnant with me. I think Duke's parents did the same thing, but I never asked. All I remember is my mother telling me to never join, ever. Being the sweet innocent child at the time, I had promised I wouldn't. Times were different, now, and if I didn't join, then I'd be dead before I knew it. I like living, thank you very much.

"My offer still stands." General Hawk stated, looking hard at me. I nodded my head and shifted to my left foot.

"I understand, sir." I replied, keeping my gaze level with his. He nodded in answer and turned to Heavy Duty and Scarlett.

"You two will break it down for her. Keep it quick, HD. You know how she is." He chuckled. I growled playfully and glared at him before following the two to a weapons room in the back.

"If you want to join us, you'll need to be mission ready, Joe style. This is the Mark One Accelerator Suit. It'll make you run faster, jump higher, and hit harder than any of your enemies." HD explained, suiting me up. He slid the titanium boots over my shoes, the cobalt machine parts snapping into place with a hiss over my arms and legs. "Head-to-toe turbo-hydraulics and highly-pressurized pneumatics." He continued, handing me an aerodynamic, flying-wing helmet. Putting it on, the cybernetics powered-up with an ear piercing whine and I winced slightly. The laser enhanced LED readouts scramble and fritz across my HUD and I smiled vaguely.

"Nice."

"Very, so don't break it, Des." Scarlett smirked. I laughed and nodded.

"I'm not the one you need to worry about. It's whoever's standing in my way that you should be fretting over, Red." I smirked back, winking. She laughed, tossing her mane of fire, eyes twinkling.

"You and I are going to be good friends."

"That we are."

"The advanced cybernetics heads-up display, feeding into your helmet," HD continued, not bothering to hide his smile. "Two gas propelled grappling spears and six ten millimeter, hi-explosive, heat seeking, fire-and-forget rockers." He looked at me, noticing the gleam in my eyes. "I have a feeling you'll be taking good care of this suit."

"Oh, you have no idea." I whispered, my eyes caressing the weaponry since my hands could not.

"And, to complete it all, a nine millimeter, caseless submachine gun capable of firing all of them in thirty seconds." he continued.

"Oh yea, I'm taking care of this baby. She's too precious to hurt on purpose." I chuckled, my smile widening. Duke and Rip walked in and simultaneously groaned.

"Man, she's going to beat our scores. Look at that face, man, you _**know**_ she's going to beat our scores!" Rip whined, banging his head melodramatically against the wall. Duke chuckled and went to pat me on the shoulder, but I moved.

"Hey, no touching the baby. You'll break her." I growled, easily moving backwards and away from him.

"It's a her?"

"Anything this dangerous has got to be female."

"What makes you say that?"

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned." I beamed.

"Hahaha, she's right, mates." Heavy Duty laughed, placing a hand gently on my shoulder.

"You let him touch her!"

"He put her on me. I trust him. You two, on the other hand, not so much."

Next thing I know, I'm running through an urban environment obstacle course with 3-D holo-projection terrorists lunging out at me. Pointing the guns swiftly at each one, I wipe them all out. At the end, the buzzer sounds and I look back to see Hawk, arms crossed, impassively taking it all in. Scarlett approached me with an electronic clipboard and smiled.

"Forty-four seconds. Impressive." She beamed, clearly proud of me.

"What was the record before?"

"Forty-five."

"Who had it?"

"Me."

"Anymore tests?"

"Just a few. Don't worry, you'll do fine." She smiled, leading me over to a mat. I glanced at her questioningly, but she just shrugged and motioned me forward. Stepping onto the blue gymnastics mat, my muscles relaxed and my mind cleared as I prepared for this next test. Whatever it was. A body dropped down from somewhere above me. My foot instinctively went out, flipping one of the sparring batons up and into my hands just as my opponent's own came crashing down on it. I looked up through narrowed eyes to see the masked face of Snake-Eyes. Pushing down my surprise, I pushed him off of me.

"Des, you forgot the helmet." I heard Duke call, worriedly most likely. I shook my head, not speaking and not looking away from the man in front of me. He made to circle me and I followed him, step for step, as we circled each other, like lions in the Savannah. He nodded slightly in approval before lunging at me, aiming for my legs. I jumped over him, making sure to hit him swiftly on the arm, all the while blocking the blow that followed my movements.

"Good. There's someone in this world who can actually put up a fight." I chuckled, landing gracefully on first the balls of my feet before rocking back to plant them more firmly. He jabbed at me again, aiming for my head, but I ducked, swiveling my body in a move only a contortionist should be able to do, and swiped at his abdomen while he wasn't blocking. The baton lightly scraped against the material and I smirked in satisfaction before dodging another blow of his, only to be caught off guard by his foot.

"Don't get too cocky, Des." Scarlett called from the sides. "He doesn't tolerate it."

"So I've noticed." I smiled, "All the better."

We ducked and dodged each other's blows, simultaneously hitting the other at some point or another.

"She's holding back." Duke whispered to Rip and Scarlett. She looked at him questioningly, but paid more attention when Rip nodded.

"Why, though? She never held back when it was just us." He voiced, crossing his arms.

I overheard them and huffed. They were right, I was holding back. Snake stopped in front of me signing something fast.

"Okay. Fine." I growled, my teeth bared at him. "No more holding back then."

And with those words, I went at him faster, harder, and dirtier than before. If he moved to one side, I followed, blocking him off until I had him blocked against the wall. Then, he turned the tables, flipping me with his foot onto my back, trapping me.

"Not good." Duke whispered.

"Why?"

"She's like a wild animal. You don't corner wild animals."

Snake signed something again and I let out a roar of anger, my mind thinking up anything it could. Finally, with a series of complicated and quick movements that required one to be incredibly fit and flexible, I had him pinned to the ground, my baton pressed onto his neck and his in the crowd.

"Pinned ya." I chuckled, getting up off of him and holding out my hand. He laid there a minute, contemplating, then took my hand as I hauled him up. I fisted one hand and pressed it against the flat palm of my other as I bowed to him. Surprised, he performed the same action.

"Congratulations, Alastrina. Welcome to the Joes." Hawk smiled smugly.

"Wait, General. I've got a bet with her." Duke smirked.

"Oh no."

"Oh yes."

"Make it quick, she needs to be debriefed." He chuckled.

Duke faced me on the mat and I threw the baton aside.

"So, are we doing hand-to-hand or will there be weapons?"

"Hand-to-hand."

"Alright then." A cheshire-cat grin spread across my face instantly and he gulped. I stood still in the center, eyes closed. He was puzzled, but took the advantage and circled me. Snake had stopped at Scarlett's hand on his shoulder and turned to face us. Duke moved around me silently, but I could feel each step as if it were my own. He lunged for my head but my arm came up to block it. My other hand shot out and twisted his arm behind his back; my knees pinned him onto the ground, a large breath escaping his lungs at the force.

"Don't do that, Duke. You always do that and I always tell you not to. When will you ever listen?" I asked, a sigh escaping my lips. Suddenly, he flipped me over, pinning me down.

"Don't underestimate me, Ally." He chuckled.

"Don't call me that."

"Why? Because that's what he called you?"

That struck a nerve and by the change in his face he knew it. Growling, I shifted to plant my feet on his stomach and swiftly pushed him off me, sending him into the opposite wall.

"You want to play dirty, bro, we'll play dirty." I hissed, my eyes burning. "So what happened to Ana, Duke? She leave you? She die? Does she even still have the ring at all?" His eyes narrowed at me, lips set in a firm line. "You started it, brother dear. Now clean up the mess you've made."

"You asked for it." With that, he lunged at me, missing my face by a foot, as I had ducked under him to plant a forceful punch to his sternum, knocking the wind out of him. Our fight continued like this for a few more minutes before I slammed him down on the ground, my trusty dagger pressed against his jugular just as he attempted to get up.

"Cheat."

"You were fighting to kill me, right?"

"Well, not really kill you but yea."

"Doesn't give me much incentive to fight fair now does it?" I replied, standing up and sliding my knife back into its protective pocket in my boot. "You owe me dinner." I called off-handedly as I walked away. "Hey, Red, show me to my room please?" I asked, smiling at her.

"Sure, this way." She chuckled, linking her arm with mine. "Good job, by the way."

"I try." I laughed, sneaking a look at Snake who's shoulders shook with silent laughter as he gave another nod of approval to me. Slowly, but surely, the silent ninja was growing on me. The only problem is, I'm not sure how much I like it and how much I don't.

"Welcome home." Hawk smiled, patting my shoulder as he passed. I briefly nodded, as my thoughts were otherwise preoccupied. I trust Snake Eyes, this I know for sure, but does he trust me? Should I let myself trust him as easily as I already had? I wasn't so sure what to do, but my brain, my heart, and my gut instinct were in agreement for once. Just the river flow the way it flows.

AN: YAY! The 3rd chapter is done! And I'd like to inform all my faithful readers that my dear friend, E.J., is the sole reason for it's lateness. Don't be too harsh with him, as he had been seeking advice…the first three sentences of our conversation at least. XD His stories are good, though, so read them!


	4. Authors Note

Hey guys, I know I haven't updated half of these in a long time. I'm really trying, but I'm starting to forget where I was going with stories, so some of them are on hiatus for a bit. I may not update very well for a bit as my father had a heart attack and went to the hospital this morning…..if any of you pray, and even if you don't, please keep him and my family in your thoughts, we've been having issues with people going to the hospital (including myself) for a few years now. I'm really sorry guys, I feel really bad about not being able to update so much, but I'm really going to try this year and get a lot out! Thanks for still reading, reviewing, and everything! It means a lot to me


	5. Remembering

**Sae: I know it's been forever and for that I am deeply sorry, I will try to get more chapters out, but school is taking up most of my time with dual enrollment classes and then family in the hospital, again. I'd like everyone, even if I don't know you, to attempt to stay OUT of hospitals . First it was my grandma, then my aunt, then me, my aunt again, my dad and my aunt….once again. I say we should all stop aging…..saves us from hospital bills and unnecessary aggravations. Thanks to everyone who kept my dad in your thoughts, btw, he's fine now. Can't wait to play golf again –sigh- I'll never understand why. **

Chapter 4: Remembering

After being acquainted with my new room, right across from Duke's, I headed off to the mess hall for food to fill my poor, empty stomach. I had my iPOD plugged in, Sick Puppies blasting in my ears. I was struck by a memory of my two best friends jokingly telling me I'd be deaf by twenty if I kept listening to my music so loud. I'd love to prove them wrong right now, but one is in the airforce and the other is in the marines. Two places I probably will never see for a while, if ever. Joe motto, when all else fails, we don't. I grabbed a sandwich, a green apple and a water and then found an empty table in the corner to sit in. Not as easy as I'd originally hoped, but I found one eventually. The song _Don't Walk Away _played in my ears and I slowed my chewing, my mind drifting off with the lyrics.

**Flashback**

"_Als, you can't seriously not want me to say goodbye to you…can you?" his voice was low and husky, nothing like it used to be when we were teenagers in high school. I shook my head and forced a smile._

"_It's not goodbye, I told you never to say that. Goodbye means for forever." I replied, willing myself not to cry. I knew this day would come, I did. All those years of him talking about going into the airforce or the marines when we were younger, at least he'd ended up doing what he always planned. I had, to my credit, gotten my masters in interior design at UF, but it had become more of a side job after I joined my friend in the underground fight clubs. James, the man in front of me, decked out in uniform, knew nothing of that, and I kept it that way. He wouldn't approve, none of my friends would, but I didn't care all that much, it made me happy, oddly. He sighed and gave me a reproachful, halfhearted glare._

"_You knew I meant 'see you soon',Als." He countered, crossing his arms, "now stop trying not to cry, it'll only make it that much worse next time you let go." The man knew me too well, it was scary sometimes. From behind him, I could see Gabe walking up, also in uniform._

"_Not you, too, Gabe! Man, I thought I told you guys I don't do goodbyes! Besides, I'll always be here when you get back," I smiled, for real this time. The tears could wait, I had a few more minutes with my boys before they left. I'd make the most of those minutes. Gabe laughed softly at me, his voice smoother than James' but just as low. _

"_Trina, you'll be fine, right? Without us, I mean." He asked, always the protective one. In actuality, they both were very protective of me, despite me being older than them. I laughed and nodded in response to his question. "Now, come on, you said you come see us off, so let's go." I nodded again and grabbed the keys to my old mustang, something I'd inherited from my father when I turned eighteen. I never had the heart to part with it, she was my pride and joy. We all piled into my car and I drove us out to the airport, the whole time Sick Puppies, a band James had gotten me to adore, played softly through the speakers. _

_As we got closer to the airport, the song __**Don't Walk Away**__ came on and I instantly teared up. Simultaneously, I received looks of concern as they knew how music could affect my moods if the lyrics struck home. Boy, were those lyrics too close._

_**Don't walk away  
And leave me without a reason  
When there's too much to say**_

_I stood in front of the terminal with the other families wishing their loved ones luck and God speed. His speed would do nothing for them, it was His protection they needed, from everything. They turned to me and shared a look over my head._

_**That hasn't been said  
I know I was wrong  
And I'm sorry for making the same mistakes  
Don't walk away**_

"_Als, you know we'll come back to you, right?" James asked, brown eyes boring into my darker ones. I nodded silently, it seemed to be the only thing I was capable of doing now. Gabe turned his gaze to me, the sparkling light blue I was accustomed to dulled with an emotion I could only describe as impending loneliness._

_**Wish I could take it back  
But you know I can't  
I hope one day you understand  
No this can't be the end  
This is the end**_

"_Trina, we'll come back, and in one piece. I promise." He muttered quietly. He always seemed to know just exactly what to say, granted he never did in his younger days, and James still had a slight issue with that ability. I nodded more vigorously, the tears I tried so hard to hide coming back with a vengeance, spilling down my face and neck. They sighed in unison and wrapped me in a hug. "C'mon, baby girl, don't cry."_

_**And I know I make it hard**_

Don't walk away  
And leave me without a reason  
When there's too much to say

"_Yea, you know we hate it when you cry, especially when it's our fault." James continued, kissing my head. I nodded and sniffled, attempting to pull myself together. _

_**That hasn't been said  
I know I was wrong  
And I'm sorry for making the same mistakes  
Don't walk away**_

_They were each called respectively to their units, and with a last smile and kisses to the head, they walked off in different directions. At that moment in time, I felt myself split into thirds, one piece each going with them, saving the smallest piece for myself. I forced myself to watch each of them until I couldn't see them anymore, from the way my vision blurred or the fact that they were on their way to their stations, I wasn't sure._

_**No this can't be the end**_

_I went back to my car, numb, and drove home. The moment I stepped inside, the door shut and locked, I collapsed in ball of tears, my mind bursting with all the things I'd left unsaid, how I loved them both and that they had better find some unearthly way to look out for each other; that I didn't know what I'd do without them around to make me laugh when things looked like hell on earth. After a while, I think I finally passed out after managing to move onto my couch. _

_**It felt like you and me were getting better**_

_End Flashback_

As the song ended, I came back to reality, noticing for the first time that Rip and Duke were on either side of me, an arm around my shoulders each. I also noticed that I was crying. I shouldn't have been surprised, my past wasn't something I liked to spend time remembering, not since the news probably caught a video of my car blowing up. I knew James and Gabe would've seen it, that what was left of my family would have (which was really the two men next to me and the two I'd left behind) was crushed by the knowledge that I was gone. As far as they knew, I was dead, and in order to keep them safe, I had to keep things that way. Even if it killed me on the inside, and oh God did it, I had to sacrifice myself for their benefit. If they knew where I was they would stop at nothing to do one of two things: A) join up with me or B) kidnap me and make me go back to interior designing. I'd wager the later would be their first thought, the former being a back-up plan.

"You alright?" Duke asked, squeezing my shoulder slightly. I smiled and nodded, taking the buds out of my ears so I could hear them better.

"You sure, baby girl?" Rip inquired, squeezing my other shoulder. I winced at the nickname given the memory I just re-watched but nodded my head all the same.

"Yea, I'm fine." I replied, finishing off my bottle of water, "Show me to the training room, yea? I gotta work off some steam…" Duke and Rip both nodded, offering to spar with me, but I declined, knowing that if I was going to work out my frustrations, I was bound to break something of mine, someonelse's or whatever I was working with.

Once they left me to my own devices, I plugged into my ipod again and set the playlist to _Angry Music_, something I reserved for workouts like this from the fast paced beats. The sweet sounds of _Click Click Boom_ by Saliva flowed into my ears, allowing me to time my punches and kicks to the bag in front of me with each of the three words and the beat of the drum. The songs kept switching, my pace only changing slightly depending on the beat of the drum in each song. After almost two hours, I felt a hand on my shoulder. I turned around to see Snake Eyes.

"_You seem frustrated, is everything alright?"_

"What? Oh, yea, everything's fine, Snake. Thanks for asking." I smiled, grabbing a towel and a water and relaxing a bit on the floor against the wall. The ninja sat in front of me and cocked his head to the side.

"_Would you like to meditate with me?"_ he signed again, not questioning me further, for which I was grateful. I nodded in acquiescence and shifted so that my feet sat one on each thigh, my forefinger curling to connect with my thumb as I closed my eyes and took deep, relaxing breaths. My mind began to clear and my muscles started to relax a bit more. I'm not sure how long we stayed like that, or when I had fallen asleep, but when I woke up I was in my bed and the clock to the left of me said 2:00 AM in bright, flashing red. I stood up to take a quick shower, changed, and curled back up underneath the blankets, sighing in relief. Today turned out to be a not so bad day after all.


	6. Ohne Dich

**Sae: Once again, sorry it's taken so long…..my year is turning out to be not so great. Granddaddy passed Monday February 21, 2011 at 10:30 AM. Things have been…well rough is an understatement, but, hey, it's not like I can bring him back… **** So, without further adieu, I give you chapter 5 and please keep my family (once again) in your thoughts. This year sucks so far, let's try to make it better, yea? **

**P.S: This chapter and the next (possibly the one after that, or at least half of it) will be in their point of views as Alastrina is officially training and that stuffs boring to write…or it sounded boring to write in my head, anyway, I thought this would be more interesting and also give you a better look at our wonderful….weird…characters mentioned briefly last chapter **** Enjoy!**

Chapter 5: Ohne Dich (Without You)

**(James and Gabe POV [both are on leave but this will be more third person omniscient, btw])**

Two men exited a taxi, faces somber, their eyes growing emptier as they stared at the equally empty house. The blond man sighed and began the walk up, knowing his darker haired companion would follow.

"Leave it to her to pick a house in the very back of a neighborhood and buy a bunch of land around it so she can have quiet." He mumbled, fingers skimming over the frame of the front door, searching for that secret spot she always kept a spare key for them. A small cry of triumph escaped his lips as he found the small silver key and slipped it into the lock, letting himself and his friend inside. "No need to be so quiet, James, you know she'd hate that."

"She's gone, what does it matter what she would have liked or disliked, Gabe?" he answered glumly, dark eyes roving around the house. He swiped a finger across a table, not even a single speck of dust. "Typical of her to get a maid or someone to take care of the house." They walked through the house looking around, smiling softly at the touches she'd left around it, forever imprinting herself upon that place. Gabe continued up the stairs and turned to his left, happening upon her open bedroom door and the hairs on the back of his neck instantly stood on end. His back straightened and he placed his hand reflexively on the gun at his hip. _'Something's not right here…she never leaves her door open...'_ he thought tapping out Morse code on the wall, hoping James would hear it.

Down below in the library (as the door was labeled, but it was more of a den with the walls covered with shelves upon shelves of books), James picked up a book that had lain skewed on top of a few others on the coffee table. It was as if she had just set it down and had every intention of coming back in to curl up in the chaise lounge by the fire place and begin reading it again. He smiled softly at the memories of her minor habits, sticking the tip of her tongue out when she was concentrating on something, the wild hand gestures as she talked passionately about things she loved, or the way she'd just get frustrated with something of hers, hit it, and then immediately apologize, as if it lived and cared. The near silent tapping sound reached his ears finally and his head perked up, concentrating on understanding the code. *_**Something's wrong. Come upstairs. First door on left. Be cautious.***_ he nodded, though no one could see the motion, and drew his own gun, quietly making his way to the aforementioned room.

Upon arrival, James noticed that Gabe was kneeling down near her desk, finger tips brushing incredibly lightly along the woods surface, where her laptop surely had lain, and the floor next to it.

"What is it, Gabe?"

"Someone else was here. She had left her bedroom door open, clothes are gone, laptops gone, and her car keys are gone." He replied.

"Well obviously, her car blew up and she was fried to a crisp and died." James argued, gritting his teeth at the mention of it all. Gabe shook his head and sighed in frustration as he stood up.

"You don't get it, look over where you're standing; her room is in disarray, she was freaked. Someone was here with her, and I'm going to guess that someone had a problem with her."

"Why do you say that?"

"She wouldn't have run if she didn't think she was in danger. C'mon, James, you know her. If there's a fight she thinks she can win, she'll never back down."

"Yea, I know," he nodded, "it's why we always had to bandage her up or keep her on lock down." Gabe nodded and tripped over a shoe lying in the middle of the floor, his hand going to the wall to break his fall. There was a hiss and a near silent click as a latch was released and part of the wall split in half, the top and bottom halves pulling apart as a weapons case extended. Both men stood there in shock. It wasn't like they weren't used to her having blades of some kind that was normal, something she loved to have and play with, but these weren't blades, these were guns, LOTS of guns.

"I….um….uh…James….I'm lost…I coulda swore she hated guns." Gabe murmured as he stepped closer to the case for a better look. James stood silent behind him; he shook his head and blinked before following his friend.

"She does…..or did…at least, I thought she did. She always paraphrased the Joker about it, remember? 'Guns are too quick…with knives you can savor every little emotion...' it was her favorite thing to say in her defense of not getting a gun for more effective protection like we wanted." He answered, not even daring to touch the various pistols and the two shot guns she'd apparently left.

"Wow...this is in the shape of a .44 magnum, that one must have been a .45 desert eagle, and…dude! She had a 10mm sub machine gun! Seriously? The only time she listens to us to get guns and she only takes the bare minimum and not even her shotguns? I so wish she was here so I could berate her for this….no contingency plan." Gabe scoffed. James chuckled and shook his head.

"Dude, shotgun to the face is not a contingency plan, it was just Sarge hating Grif and wanting him dead."

"So? What's your point? Trina thought it was a great plan."

"Yea, to use on us, or did you forget that part?" Gabe's face dropped at this as he remembered.

"Oh…right…forgot about that bit." He went to say something else, but James shushed him, swinging himself around to point his gun at the open door, all his attention on the faint sound he had heard from downstairs, like someone walking through the front door. They inched their way silently downstairs, guns at the ready. Gabe motioned James to go first, as he was the quicker (more rational is more like it...) shot (fyi: Gabe is trigger happy). He followed the sound, Gabe matching his footsteps, and spun around a corner, facing the back of a mysterious figure shrouded in the shadows of a newly opened (and darkened) library.

"I'm not sure this is your house, buddy. I'd suggest you leave." He growled, Gabe coming up beside him, blocking the only exit. The figure put their hands up, entire body shaking from the stiffness caused by fear, and turned around. Both men narrowed their eyes, until the figure moved more into the light. A look of astonishment, and partial shame, flashed over their faces and they dropped their guns to their sides, mumbling apologies.

"You must be James and Gabe. I've heard stories about you two. If you're here for something of Ms. Hauser's, I'm afraid you can't have anything. I was given strict orders that should she ever disappear for a while, everything was to be kept neat and tidy as it was."

"Who are you and how do you know Trina?" Gabe questioned, the feminine voice not really loosening him up at all. The figure smirked, a curve of red lips on a tanned face.

"Her maid," The sound of a gun being cocked struck a nerve in both of them, "you two should really learn to watch the hands." She fired and their worlds went black (except Gabe's whose then exploded into colors of magical rainbows, unicorns, and halo).

**So, that hadn't been the planned ending…but I thought it needed something, and please don't kill me for that cliff hanger **** I'd really like to thank everyone that's reviewed so far, especially bee27 for the prayers/thoughts during that time with my dad **** you guys are awesome! Keep reviewing!**


	7. Engel

**Yes, I realize the last chappie and this one are entitled songs by Rammstein, as I am having issues coming up with awesome titles now, but Rammstein is awesome enough so :P**

Chapter 6: Engel (Angel)

Gabe groaned and rolled over, but could only move so much as his right wrist was cuffed to something. Another groaned sounded from the direction of the cuff and Gabe then deduced it was a some_one_ and not a some_thing_ he was attached to. Opening his eyes, he realized it was James, and once both men were sitting up, they realized they were weaponless and staring down the barrel of a shotgun.

"So, who are you two?" she asked, her voice slightly harsh due to a partially lost accent.

"Friends of Trina's." Gabe replied, receiving an elbow to the ribs a millisecond later.

"She could be a spy or something!" James whispered harshly, glaring at the woman. She moved the shotgun to face him directly.

"My name is Engelina Korsov, my father was Russian and my mother was German. Both are dead now. I've worked with Ms. Hauser for as long as you two have been away. I know names, but I've never seen pictures of you, she keeps that very private from everyone. Anything else you'd like to know?" Both men shook their heads and she uncuffed them.

"I'm Gabriel, Gabe for short, and that's James. We've been Trina's friends since childhood and we're just trying to figure out what's going on." He spoke softly, rubbing his wrist from the slight twinge. She nodded and put up the shotgun.

"I hadn't expected her to leave so suddenly, but she left me a message saying she was with her brother and she may not be able to contact me for a while due to training..oh!" she gasped, her hands flying to her mouth.

"What?" James asked, mind already putting together the pieces she'd laid out.

"I wasn't supposed to tell you!" she exclaimed, "Oh, Ms. Hauser isn't going to be happy, she said never to tell you where she was when she disappeared."

Gabe looked at her wide eyed and dashed up to Trina's room, tearing through the desk and finally finding the white external hard drive taped beneath the bottom drawer. A cry of triumph escaped him and he raced down to the computer in the library, plugging it in.

"What've you got there, Gabe?" James asked, strolling into the room and taking a seat beside him.

"Cracking the password on her hard drive….does she have to know mythology so well?" he groaned, "Who's the Trickster?" The room was silent for a few minutes before Engelina came forward, leaned down, and whispered in his ear, "Loki." Gabe blushed but typed it in, beaming when it worked. "Thanks, Engel!" She blushed at the nickname, but welcomed the thanks and left them to figure things out.

**I know its short, but it's just to tide you guys over before I get more free time in Disney for my grad weekend trip Thanks for everything guys! Be back soon!**


	8. Things You See In a Graveyard

**I know I'm long LONG overdue for an apology. Life has been dealing me losing hands repeatedly and I'm just honestly not handling it well…not that my family is really being all that helpful…-sigh- I really am sorry, and I'm sure most of you have plotted my murder at this point because of the great delay, and I really can't blame you, but I have to ask you to be patient as I probably will take a while to update after this chapter as I'm trying to get into the habit of actually writing more than one chapter before posting an update…because that's what I should've been doing from the start…..I'm awful, I know. T-T I'm so sorry.**

Chapter 7: Things You See In a Graveyard

James and Gabe sat back in astonishment at all the data she'd kept hidden, every secret she had laid bare before them in this technological diary.

"No wonder she didn't want us to know….I feel like slapping her, I mean, ya know, if she wasn't a girl." Gabe muttered, the ending tapering off into silence. Beside him, James smirked and shook his head.

"You mean if she wasn't a girl who could kick your ass in five milliseconds?" he chuckled at the glare Gabe sent him, childishly sticking his tongue out. They sighed as one when they looked back at the screen. "Think we should go pay her mom and dad a visit? We used to go with her all the time, remember?"

"Yea, she'd always take sunflowers and lilies, I thought it was the weirdest combination of flowers, but when she put them on different markers, I understood."

"What you thought she was going to make an arrangement out of that?"

"Look, I'm a guy, okay? I don't know about flowers!"

"Yes, we know, especially from that time you—"

"Shut up, we're not speaking of that moment!"

"But Als thought it was funny,"

"Well…she's not here so…shut up." Gabe grumbled, crossing his arms, "Let's just go get a few of each and head over to say hi and stuff," They got up and thanked Engelina for her "help" before heading out the door to grab a taxi.

**~~Meanwhile~~**

I took a breath and knocked on the door, waiting patiently for an answer. A gruff voice finally responded and the door slid open. I walked smoothly into his office and stood at attention until directed to have a seat.

"Now, what is it I can help you with, Demona?" he asked, smiling at me. I beamed at the use of my newly acquired nickname, given only a week ago almost because Rip thought 'Desdemona' was just far too long (Red decided it was because it was too complicated for him to say).

"I was wondering if I could fly back home for a few hours, General. I understand that things are tight since the incident, but I have a tradition I'd rather not break." I replied, steadying my voice and preparing for an outright 'Absolutely not'. The General shot me a suspicious look, most likely derived from the amount of pranks I'd pulled on Duke and Rip, and once or twice on himself, though nothing major.

"What's this tradition of yours?" he asked, folding his hands together on his desk and leaning forward a bit, blue eyes boring into my nearly onyx ones. I sighed and lowered my head to stare momentarily at my hands folded neatly in my lap, contemplating on if he'd think it stupid or if I should go ahead with it.

"Every year, on the anniversary of their death, I go to the graveyard to visit my parents. Do the usual, you know? Take some flowers, "talk" a bit to them, and then leave," I answered finally, deciding I might as well go through with it. He sat back and stared at me with a calculating look. I fidgeted a bit in my seat, slightly unnerved by his stare, but eventually his face split into a sad smile and he nodded his head, signing some papers for me. I stared at the papers in confusion, "Sir, I only needed one for myself, who are the other two for?" I looked up into his knowing face and realized how much of a father the man had become to me in a short amount of time. It caused a slight pang in my chest, remembering my real father giving me that same look when I asked a question similar to that.

"They're for Duke and Rip. I assumed you wouldn't want to be alone on this." He replied standing up. I followed his example, giving my thanks in the form of a simple look, knowing if I opened my mouth now, I'd start crying. General Hawk dismissed me and I moved quickly back towards my quarters, veering only slightly to bang on Duke's door.

"Hey, dork face, open up!" I yelled through the door, more than likely waking Ripcord up from his nap down the hall, though I'm pretty sure Scarlet may have kicked him in the ass already about doing that. I could hear disgruntled mumblings faintly before the door slid open in front of me and I was faced with a not-so-happy looking Duke.

"What?" he growled, eyeing my innocent smile with some well-deserved suspicion. I placed a paper in his hands and shoved him inside, seating myself on his bed as I waited patiently for his brain to kick into gear.

"You and Rip are coming with me, apparently. The General knows me better than I thought." I smiled softly, reclining a bit. Duke read over the papers and nodded, flashing me an apologetic look.

"When do we leave?" he asked quietly, sitting down beside, a muscled arm wrapped comfortingly around my shoulders. I leaned my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes, taking a breath to steady myself.

"In an hour, so pack fast. We'll only be in town long enough for me to carry out the tradition and maybe get food if we're hungry."

"So roughly four or five hours, then?" he smirked, knowing I'd want to stay for as long as possible.

"Pretty much. Man, you guys have me all figured out! It's just no fun anymore." I sighed in defeat, getting up and heading towards the door.

"Trust me, Mona, we don't have you all figured out, we're just used to how you function. That, and I know there's a certain ninja you have a thing for that knows almost next to nothing about you." He chuckled as I blushed. A scowl crossed my face and I threw the nearest object at him, which, to his misfortune, was a full water bottle. "Hey! Not necessary!"

"Totally was, see you at the plane!" I giggled, skipping out and down to Rip's room to repeat the process, hopefully minus the teasing. (AN: Thought I should mention, it's been a few months since the "accident", as none of this could be achieved in days. I just didn't have the creative inspiration to write out everything that happened to her in those few months besides that it was training...lots of training.) "Ripcord, open up!" I heard a groan and a feminine laugh, followed by a distinct 'I told you so'.

"What, Demon?" he grumbled, mock glaring at the red head I knew was behind him, but couldn't see. I huffed slightly and handed him a paper. He glanced at it and nodded, surprisingly quickly. "See you at the plane, then, I guess. When do we leave?"

"Hour,"

"Damn, woman!" I shrugged at his playful outrage.

"I hadn't anticipated company on this one or I would've warned you days ago. So, you pack, have fun with Red and I'm going to make sure I've got everything I need," I smiled and waved a little, "Bye!" He shut the door and I walked a little further down to my room.

I had been staring at the floor, thinking, when I'd bumped into a rather solid object that was standing in front of my door. Looking up, I took note of all the black and the crossed arms. If I'd had an idea of what his face looked like to begin with, I'm pretty sure Snake was raising an eyebrow in question. "Sorry, Snake," I smiled softly, "I was lost in my thoughts," He nodded and moved back enough to allow me into my room. Biting my lip, I turned around and fixed him with an inquiring stare. "Would you like to come in? I've got some time to kill, and I wouldn't mind spending some of it with you. The silence is sort of nice after dealing with Duke and Rip," He nodded and quickly stepped in my room, closing the door behind him, and waited for me to gesture to the only actual chair in the room.

_"What's with the bag?"_ he signed, settling into the comfy leather spinning chair I'd gotten for the desk.

"Oh, um, Duke, Rip and I are heading back to the hometown, go visit my parents," I shrugged, "It's a tradition. I guess it's sort of stupid what with everything going on right now, but..." I let the sentence hang, only now thinking of the risk that we could possibly be in, or the Joes could be in with the Alpha team separated, even if for only a few hours or so. He huffed and shook his head quickly.

_"Traditions that include family, living or not, are never stupid, besides, we can handle things here without those two,"_ I think I heard him chuckle, possibly sarcastically, but I can't be sure. We hadn't actually sat down to talk except for the brief conversations before we meditated in the training room.

"True, you seemed to do just fine without them before," I grinned, "I imagine it was very quiet then," He nodded and this time I was sure I heard a breathy chuckle, though it was very low. "So, I feel sort of bad that we spend all this time together training and meditating, but we really don't know much about the other, do we?"

_"What's your favorite color?"_ I laughed at the immediate response.

"Uh, that's a tough one. It really depends on my mood, or the day, I guess,"

_"So what's your favorite color right now?"_

"Blue," I smiled, "Arctic blue. Yours?"

_"Black."_ I smirked at him.

"Really? That's all you've got?" He shook his head at me again and put a hand to his chin. I found myself wishing he didn't have his mask on just so I could see the expressions, or at least be able to hear him speak, though I knew he took a vow of silence, something I never questioned.

_"Favorite poet?"_

"You remembered I love poetry," I was slightly stunned; the last time any sort of literature was spoken about was months ago when I'd arrived. At his answering nod, I thought for a moment or two about my own answer. "I'd have to say Poe. As much as I adore Shakespeare, Poe has been my favorite from childhood," He leaned back in what I assumed was surprise. "I like the darker things in life, what can I say? So, what about you, have a favorite poet?"

"_Hawthorne is nice, as well as Poe, but I've never picked a favorite. I suppose both."_ I nodded and smiled.

"Ah, the dark romantics," I glanced at the clock on my wall and gasped, "It's been almost an hour already? I didn't think I'd walked that slowly to my room!" I bit my lip again and stared at my bag and then Snake. "Walk me down to the hangar? I'll tell you something not even Duke or Rip knows," With a breathy "chuckle", he nodded and, before I could protest, grabbed my bag and opened the door for me. "Wow," I breathed, "A girl could get used to having a gentleman around for once," He dropped his head a bit, possibly flattered or slightly embarrassed, though I bet it was the former, and I walked past him out the door. It shut behind us with a click and we walked down towards the hangar. We passed a few other Joes on the way, and once we were more or less alone, he nudged my shoulder.

"Oh right, the secret bit," I coughed, "Okay, well you can't let them know at all," I waited till he nodded before I continued. "So, I used to do underground fights, sometimes cage matches, for money, but it wasn't all I did," He nodded for me to continue, but I hesitated, blushing a dark crimson. "I also sang, every now and then, at a local pub. Helped pay the bills, I guess you could say, but with the trust fund from the parental units, I didn't really have to worry about that."

_"Then why go through all that to get money?"_

"I wanted to prove to myself I could do it on my own, too. I didn't want to just sit back and live off of what my parents gave me for as long as it lasted only to fall on my ass. I wanted to feel like I earned that trust fund," I shrugged, "They don't know I sang, though. I'm pretty sure they don't even know I sing at all," There was silence for a bit. We were practically at the hangar when he stopped for a moment and turned to me.

_"Will you sing for me?"_ I was floored for a moment. The conflicting emotions about singing in general were awful. I was okay with my appearance, I'd gotten over that hurdle a while ago, but my voice was something I'd always been self-conscious of singing, no matter the words of encouragement from the people at the pub or random strangers who heard me from my car or my yard. He moved his hands, I guess to say that I didn't have to, that he wouldn't force me if I wasn't comfortable, but I never found that out.

"Sure." I whispered, face flaming red. He nodded, I think he was smiling, but that damn mask was in the way. It was really starting to irritate me. I _liked_ seeing peoples' expressions; it made it easier for me to read their emotions to figure out how to go about being around them. With Snake it was a constant guessing game and I was always afraid I'd screw up somehow and seriously offend the guy. Offending ninja's isn't really high on my 'To Do' list, I rather enjoy living. We continued walking, at a slightly slower pace as we had some extra time. I took a breath, trying to calm myself a bit. "I bought my ticket for the long way 'round, two bottles of whiskey for the way, and I sure would like some sweet company, and I'm leavin' tomorrow, what'd ya say? When I'm gone, when I'm gone, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my hair, you're gonna miss me everywhere. Oh, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone," I paused for a moment to calm my frazzling nerves. "I bought my ticket for the long way 'round, the one with the prettiest of views. It's got mountains, it's got rivers, it's got sights to give you shivers, but it sure would be prettier with you. When I'm gone, when I'm gone, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone. You're gonna miss me by my walk, you're gonna miss me by my talk, oh, you're gonna miss me when I'm gone." There was silence as the song finished and we entered the hangar. I tried valiantly to calm the raging fire occurring in the blood vessels in my face, but my nerves weren't letting me. I could very well hear my heart hammering in my chest, my hands shaking the way they always do when I sing, and I was sure he could hear it.

_"You have a beautiful voice, Trina, I wouldn't mind hearing you sing more often,"_ he wrapped one my of shaking hands in his big, gloved one and squeezed a bit before letting go. It'd been a sign of encouragement, to calm down because nothing was wrong. It was comforting, at least a tiny bit. Mostly it was incredibly nerve-wracking. Months of not really talking, only meditating together nearly every day and training on top of that. I knew next to nothing about him, but I was so drawn to him, like a moth to the flame. _'Don't be dumb now, Trins, you can't logically be crushing on Snake. You don't even really know him. All you know is his favorite color and poet…also that he likes your singing voice and, as far as we know, enjoys your company,'_ I smiled at him, my usual brightness, and gave into the overwhelming, and completely embarrassing now that I think about it, urge to hug him. His body went stiff for a moment, his hands settling hesitantly on my shoulders before one patted me gently on the head. I hurried away from him, taking my bag at the same time and blushing furiously. Mumbled apologies spilled from my lips as I became incredibly interested in the patterns of metal on the floor. He huffed a small "laugh" and ruffled my hair before turning to leave the way we'd come. Hoisting the bag onto my shoulder, I got on the plane, stowing my stuff safely underneath the seat and waited patiently for Duke and Rip to get on.

Duke was the first one on, followed closely by Ripcord. This would've made me happy, as it meant we'd be on our way finally and I could continue my tradition. It would have, if it weren't for the smug smirks currently in place on their faces. I didn't even have to ask the question bubbling in my brain, the instantaneous, 'Why are you smirking like idiots?', because I already knew the answer. They'd been following us the whole time and I'd been too wrapped up in the conversation to notice. I've no idea if Snake Eyes knew, I'd have to ask him later, but I could only assume he did and hadn't thought anything of it. It is sort of hard to sneak up on him, I've yet to find someone able to do it. Not even Red can accomplish that and the two of them are thick as thieves. I smiled vaguely at the most recent memory of her latest attempt to win a bet between the two of us. It'd been one of the nights we deemed "Girls Night" where the two of us got together, either in her room or mine, maybe with another of the Joe females, but usually just us, and played random normal games while painting nails/doing hair. At first it'd started out as truth or dare, but somehow, and I really can't remember exactly how, the inability to sneak up on Snake was brought into conversation. She'd confidently exclaimed that it couldn't be that hard, to which I'd scoffed, claiming that she'd only think that because A) she'd never tried and B) she was the closest to him of all people. There was this gleam in her eye, like I'd said she couldn't do it at all, so she issued a bet: if she was able to successfully sneak up on Snake, I'd have to dye my hair pink (this was –and still is- very displeasing to me) and if she wasn't able to accomplish this feat, she'd have to do the same (I found we had a common distaste of the color pink and most of its various shades). Needless to say, so far she's been unsuccessful and the bet was going to time out in a week.

Shifting from inside my memories to the present, I glared at the two _boys_ in front of me as the bird took off. Rides still made me a bit iffy, as it usually brought to mind how I got here in the first place months ago. It still amazed me that it was, at least, six, maybe almost seven months ago that I'd been targeted and eventually "rescued" by the Joes to be brought back here. _'Time really does fly,'_ I grimaced at the thought, slamming my eyes closed at the involuntary images that would sometimes plague my mind in my sleeping moments. They say the first time you kill someone, in self-defense or in war, it really sticks with you. No matter how much "help" you get or how much meditation you do to put it behind you, it's always there and it constantly torments me: did I take away someone's wife? Husband? Father or mother? Brother or sister? Did I really destroy someone else's family like others had destroyed mine? My teeth ground together at the thoughts racing through my head and suddenly, I wished I'd asked for a fourth paper for Snake Eyes or Scarlett, just to have someone else I spoke my inner most thoughts to around. I trust Duke and Rip, don't get me wrong, but while they're two of my best friends, I didn't want them to worry. Red was the only real female friend I had in the Joes. I mean, sure, the others were nice and we spoke if we ran into each other, but I didn't have anything in common with them. So, whenever I needed someone, decidedly female, she was who I ran to, and if I needed someone to just listen while I ranted about anything and everything, I usually went to Snake. While Red would listen, yes, she'd usually add her own input and sometimes I didn't want to hear it while I was mid-rant. She has a temper as bad as mine, though we're both rather good at controlling it (sometimes), but it's not always good for fire to rage next to another.

So, for the next few hours of flight time, I studiously ignored the quiet whispers and snickers of the boys, knowing they were conversing about me and Snake and planning on ways to tease me, knowing the ninja was unflappable and it was difficult for them to elicit an emotional response from him without possibly offending him. Whilst ignoring, which, mind you, is very difficult with these two around, I focused my mind on my "happy place" as Snake forced me to call it. I still remember snickering at that and distinctly feeling he was rolling his eyes at me beneath his mask. My mind brought the hazy images of a beach into focus: the clear blue sky, the transparent turquoise waters; pristine white sand and swaying palm trees in the gentle breeze that coasted over the little island. As the sounds of the waves crashing against sandy shore and rocky outlets coursed through my brain, I felt my muscles relax, my body releasing the tension it held from the riotous thoughts previously erupting in my mind and everything melted away. By the time we landed, roughly four or five hours later, I'd put it all in the back of my mind in a box and securely locked/chained it closed until something dark would eventually break it open and the process would have to be repeated. We exited the plane in single file, comfortable in our civilian clothes, and headed to our first destination: the flower shop. It took a while to find one with lilies and sunflowers both, but we did, and proceeded to make our way to the cemetery, same as we used to.

I stared at the head stones for a while. It'd been years since they'd died, but you don't every truly get over losing the only blood family you ever had, the people who brought you into this world. Tears blurred my vision before creating tracks down my cheeks. My head bowed automatically, my knees buckling as I fell to the ground, unable to stand any longer. They were at my side in an instant; arms around my shoulders, hands holding mine even as they trembled, still clutching the small bouquets of flowers. The pain had never felt so raw, not after I'd finally thought I'd gotten past it. I'd dealt with visiting so well before, for years, but now felt different. It really hit me how much they'd missed of my life and, while I had Duke's family as my own, it wasn't the same. I felt childish, screaming in my head that it wasn't fair, that they should've been there, they shouldn't have gotten killed—all these thoughts of what should've happened, what could've been. It was childish. I knew better. It didn't stop me from crying harder, from placing the flowers as gently as my shaking hands would let me in front of the proper graves; didn't stop me from wrapping my arms around my stomach, feeling as if something was tearing me apart from the inside all over again; didn't stop me from screaming my pain into the otherwise quiet and empty cemetery. I could hear Duke and Rip on either side of me, whispering in my ears, telling me they were here, that everything was going to be okay, but it wasn't. It hasn't been. It never will be, not really. I knew I just had to suck it up and deal with it, that I wasn't the only kid to lose both parents in one go at a young age. Not all kids who did ended up being adopted into a loving family, let alone a family they'd known since they were born. I knew I was lucky. I just didn't care, not right then.

Duke kept telling me I had every right to cry, to scream, to feel pain. Rip agreed and said I'd been holding it in for too long. For this I loved them both dearly. They didn't try to quiet me, didn't try to stop my tears or my screams, even if my agonizing cries caused them pain. They held me, sheltered me, as if their sheer strength would hold me together because I couldn't do it on my own. Through my cries of internal pain, I vaguely heard pounding footsteps on the grassy pathways. Duke must've heard them, surely Rip did, that had to be the only reason he let go of me, left my side to stand and protect while Duke moved closer, shielding me from the unknown. There were voices not belonging to my two companions that seeped into my pounding head. Subconsciously, they registered, though it took a minute for my conscious mind to stop throbbing enough to receive the information. Slowly, I raised myself from my crouched position on the ground. Duke helped me stand, keeping me slightly behind him as my head dragged itself up, the tears still a constant flow. My eyes locked onto familiar dark ones, equally familiar blue ones residing in the person next to him. Their faces registered shock, all traces of angered curiosity of two men huddling around a screaming woman gone. My body moved forward before my brain told it to, Rip and Duke both staring at me curiously before flicking their eyes back to the strangers.

"Trina?" the blue eyed man asked, his hand reaching towards me hesitantly. The man with the dark eyes was pale, both appearing to have seen a ghost, or something of the sort.

"It can't be…I mean…we hoped, but…the car," the other stuttered, never good with words. I felt my lips curl into a smile, or what could've been considered one. Judging by the flinches from all parties, it probably looked demented.

"James? Gabe?" my voice trembled as it struggled to make its way out of my throat, scratched raw from the screams. I stumbled towards them, my arms throwing themselves around their necks as my legs gave out, their arms instantly wrapping around me to hold me up even as Duke and Rip instinctively moved forward to help. I felt tears on my neck and heard Gabe's muffled prayers of thanks and threats to never do that again. James was silent, no tears, but the fierce grip he had on my body was enough to convey that he agreed with everything Gabe was saying. As angry as I could've been that they'd cracked my code, or that Engelina had helped them when I'd told her under no circumstances was she to do so, there was an overwhelming sense of happiness, of relief. It all crashed into me at once. Yes, it mattered that my parents died, it was okay for me to feel childish about it sometimes; It was okay for me to scream and cry when the pain was too much, but in the end, the important people, the four people I needed to carry on with my life, were alive, well, and right there when I needed them most.


End file.
